The Orkney Brewery, makers of Skull Splitter Ale, a tasty brew that I first tasted as a member of the microbrewed beer of the month club, has had to mount a defense of its label art which could be withdrawn from sale in the UK following a report claiming that the labels are too aggressive.

You've got to be kidding me? This is aggressive? Do the guys that wrote this report get cable? The report was commissioned by the Portman Group, by the way, in the event that you'd like to know where to direct your letters.

Skull Splitter, created over 20 years ago, was singled out in the report as it was thought that its name implies violence. Additionally, because the brew weighs in at 8.5% ABV, it was more likely that the name and violent label would make the drinker more inclined towards violence when drinking it.

Man oh man, it's a crazy world we live in. Somebody oughta sell tickets. I'm so agitated, I just might go bust out a skullsplitter and then bust me some heads.